“The cost of a thing is the amount of life which is required to be exchanged for it.” -Henry David Thoreau
I have always felt like the world moves way too fast for me. I need time to process, analyze and soak in my experiences but it feels like everything is a constant race to the finish line.
In the busy, daily grind, it feels like we’re all trying to complete a marathon of tasks and responsibilities that leaves us exhausted, frazzled, and anxious. In our attempt to get more done, we sacrifice efficiency, fulfilment, joy and authenticity.
In contrast, when we learn how to slow down and live more intentionally, we live fulfilling, rewarding and authentic lives.
How do we live more slowly? And how do we get everything done at the same time? The key, I believe, is to focus on the things that matter most in our lives.
It’s in finding ways to do those things most effectively and cut out the unnecessary parts of our lives that weigh us down. It’s also important to let go of perfectionism and embrace the idea of “enough.”
It’s all easier said than done, and it takes a well-curated balance of routine and flexibility. With the right intention in mind, living a well-paced life with ease is possible.
In my own experience, as a new mother, I have felt the constant pressure to “do it all.” On top of that, I often feel overwhelmed with the pressure to do things a certain way.
Our society is social-media driven, and we feel the need to post pictures that display an ideal life. We read articles on how babies should sleep, proper childhood development, the milestones they should reach at each stage, and the list goes on.
Add to that, we feel the pressure to keep our children entertained in a Montessori fashion, make well-balanced and healthy meals, and cultivate them into kind and independent creatures.
Many of us have careers, families, friends, pets, chores and personal interests we need to attend to, along with a huge list of other responsibilities.
Life is truly challenging sometimes. Especially in this day and age. And sometimes we feel like we can’t do it all. For me, this is where slow and intentional living comes into play.
I am realizing that less is actually more, and the secret to my own personal fulfilment is in letting go of what I don’t need.
Here are some ways I put this into practice:
Focus on what matters most. In order to live a more slow and stable life, I focus on what matters most. For me, it’s spending quality time with my children and husband, having a (mostly) clean and clutter-free space for my own mental health, being organized and fulfilled in my career, and doing simple things that I enjoy like listening to music or an audiobook. I also enjoy going for a walk outside, talking to a friend on the phone, or taking a hot bath.
I am learning to organize my life around these things and letting things that aren’t as much of a priority fall away. If things don’t go as planned, I readjust and accept that life is messy sometimes, which leads me to:
Adapt. And let go of perfection while you’re at it. I have struggled throughout my life by obsessing over things that really don’t matter. If the house is a mess, I will find time to tidy it later. I used to beat myself up about every little thing that wasn’t perfect. Now, I am learning, that if something doesn’t end up going as planned, I can keep on moving forward anyway.
Efficiency. One thing that helps me live more slowly and authentically is finding the most efficient way to do things. The saying “work smarter not harder” is one of my life mottos!
I am learning why moms have so many “hacks,” because we’re learning survival techniques! And in my work life, I find that if I focus on one task at a time and give it my full attention instead of rushing through it, it always comes out better.
Cut out the unnecessary. Our attention is constantly pulled in a thousand directions. I used to find myself scrolling social-media, not even realizing what I was doing. I spent too much time watching Netflix, always had background noise playing, and was trying to do too much at once.
I have learned to cut out the unnecessary in my life, or at least greatly reduce it. I spend way less time on social media, which helps my mental health tremendously.
I limit the amount of TV I watch, and I choose one book or podcast to listen to at a time. I am intentional about how I spend my free time, making sure to have plenty of down-time to rest.
When I get a free moment, my mind is usually screaming “What do I do with this time?!” and I feel frazzled trying to direct myself. Instead, I try to practice gratitude for a quiet moment and let it be enough as it is.
I try asking myself, “What do I need right now?” and go with that.
Let it be enough. We are constantly immersed in a world that demands “more.” We are always looking for bigger and better, and we compare our lives to other people’s lives. We lose sight of beautiful moments, because we’re too focused on what the moment is lacking, rather than being present and joyful for what the moment is.
When we begin to believe that what we have is enough, our lives feel fuller and there’s a certain lightness we carry with us.
Life as it is, is enough. Who we are is enough, what we have is enough, everything else is just a bonus.
Sit in the silence. Noise overthrows our spirits when it’s constantly in the background. Sitting in the silence gives us time to feel grounded and calm. Our true selves emerge in the quiet. Sitting in silence, especially after a long day, helps me unwind and feel whole again.
It’s like I spread my energy all over the place throughout the day, and a quiet moment at night is the time where I collect myself again and feel whole.
Learning to live more slowly and intentionally has helped me become the best version of myself. I am learning that I am enough as I am. I feel more organized and composed to face the day and I am so much more grateful for all that I have. I spend my time intentionally on things that matter in my life, and I let go willingly of the rest.
